The Real World: InISH

Initiative. (Excuse me while I throw up in my mouth a little bit.) Ahem...re-try...initiative. Whew, barely got through that one. You know it's there. You know you have to take it. Alright, I know I have to take it. As an adult you always have to do things on your own and find opportunities on your own. What's the deal with that? I mean, in every aspect of everything we're supposed to be self-starters and go-getters. And I don't mean the big stuff, I mean the little stuff. Things to do on a Friday night, plans for the weekend, finding creative outlets, blah blah-blah-blah blah blah!

Childhood is cake. I mean, parents are always good for suggesting activities. All you have to do is whine, "I'm boooored," and they're right there with opportunities to combat boredom. Who cares that they say it in an exasperated tone. Who cares that you probably whined to them five minutes ago about the very same boredom problem. (Yeesh, say "boredom" more.) They'll still tell you to "go read a book" or "play outside" or "make me dinner." They give you some help. Alas, you can't quite pull that off as a grown up. Any time lately that I've said, "I'm boooored," in the most annoying tone possible, people have just said, "yeah" like they didn't care or rolled their eyes or something. I resent this. What do you mean I have to do stuff on my own? Why am I not set up with a free life coach for life or a free career counselor for life or a free scheduler/assistant for life? I had those things when I was a kid. I had those things when I was in high school, kind of. I had those things when I was in college, kind of. I had those things when I graduated college and lived with my parents whilst working full time for a year, kind of. I had those things in grad school, kind of. I had help!

See how I whine? It's a hard knock life for us grown ups. If we want to be active and productive and creative we have to take initiative and find outlets on our own. Gag me with a shovel. I don't know if I fully realized that when I graduated and moved up here. Sure, I knew that there would be some self-starting on my part because I didn't know many people and I was new to everything. However, I didn't realize how much time it would take up, trying to have a life. Don't get me wrong, being a bum is my all-time favorite course of action, but I can't do that all the time. Even I have my limits.

There's been a little trial and error in the initiative department over the past year. I've joined a community orchestra and subsequently become disillusioned with the community orchestra. I've joined a church and volunteered to help out with the pre-K kids who constantly attempt to break my back when they see me on Sundays. I've joined Bible studies and tried to share my feelings about life without sounding like a broken record. I've given serious thought to training for a 10K or something and subsequently decided that such ideas were ludicrous and I'd best stick to running on the treadmill for 30 minutes. I've joined the gym and taken some gym-ish classes. (Not to depress you) But now that the summer's wrapping up I feel a new wave of pressure for more initiatives to commence. Hence, I joined a meetup group at www.meetup.com for musicians in the DC area - it's a chamber music group that meets a couple times a month to sight read stuff and practice some stuff...I don't know, I just joined and haven't been to a meeting yet. I plan on participating in another small group through my church this fall. But you know, none of these things quite fulfill my desire to be involved around here. I mean, that's plenty, and even those obligations will tax my patience to the limit. Why do I have to go to a meeting again, I'll think to myself, I just went to one a month ago! However, I will still feel the need to do more around the city, taking full advantage of all opportunities while I'm here.

Solution - blogs. Not my blog, DC blogs. A friend of mine introduced me to a couple good blogs that will give me all the coolest things to do in the city for young professionals. (e.g. dcist.com and welovedc.com) Um, no, I will not be doing all these things. I'll venture a guess at the average number of things I'll do per month - .5 - yes, half a thing per month. I just think it's great that I'm even informing myself of things to do around the city. That's step one! Much more initiative and I just might have that throw-up-in-my-mouth problem again. I can't get too crazy.

Ugh, I'm exhausted. That just exhausted me even thinking about all that nonsense. I really need someone to just tell me where to go, put all necessary cash and ID cards in my pocket so I can enjoy myself, dress me so I don't have to decide what to wear, and give me transportation to and from said activity/ies. Is that too much to ask??? The answer is no. The answer is NO.

I realize that I find much of the nitty gritty in the real world to be something that warrants a lot of complaint. I didn't know all this was going to be necessary. Warning, anyone? Probably more so now than ever I feel like a petulant child, stomping my foot because things aren't exactly the way I thought they'd be. Eh, what else can you do as a self-starting initiative-taking 20-something? That's basically the story of our lives and anyone who says differently is selling something. You older folk, you've been there. You younger folk, good luck.